MOAB LOVES US!

Well me and my man eater cohorts took a little trip down south to get away from the coldness of Provo. It was amazing even with some mishaps like getting pulled over (twice but talked my way out of a second speeding ticket), a tire blow out, a lack of a campsite, a lack of matches, etc. etc. Good thing we kept getting help from random men like true damsels in distress. Examples below....

1. It sucks to get speeding tickets but I knew I was guilty and I kind of think Chief Barry thought my willingness to accept the consequences was endearing. He did write me down for only going nine over and he let us take a picture with him and his sweet stache.

2. This wasn't just a flat. This was like a tire explosion. We were already in the middle of fixing it when this guy pulled over but it was nice of him to finish it off for us. And thanks to Earl, the only guy in Green River who had the right tire size.

Not sure why it looks like we're holding hands because I definitely wasn't.

Not sure why Olivia has her hand on his shoulder. Hmmm?

3. Forgot the matches. We're super cheap (and tickets and tires are pricey) so we went to Motel 6 to try and bum some off of them when one of the tenants said he had an extra lighter in his truck we could have. Thanks for the light random man!

4. Going along with the cheapness we talked these guys down to a child's price to rent bikes. The owner said he had never done that before but who could deny the bargaining skills of three experts?

5. Last but not least, we didn't have a campsite but ended up paying a guy 12 bucks and some smores for two nights right next to the Colorado River. Since we never got a pic here's a shout out to Lloyd, his friend we nicknamed Cortez, the guy on unemployment, and the reserved dude who didn't mind that we squealed whenever we saw a mouse.

Oh and making lemons out of lemonade I noticed that I had mice poison in my trunk but only because it was under the spare. Had we not gotten a blow out we never would have been prepared for the furry creatures.

tchau,

diana

ps-Olivia i know you're going to read this. Viktoria and I miss you tons!!!!!!!!!!! Best weekend of 2011 soon to be topped by San Fran!!!

This is what I do on the weekends....

I work on movies. And I get to do the most random things like herd sheep, build bridges, get thrown onto beds, and find creative ways to transport things with my car. Definitely beats a 9-5 job, well minus the whole not getting paid thing:)

This was up Provo Canyon. We had to get the entire crew to surround these sheep to get them to stay. I'm sure we were disgracing real sheep herders but at least we got the job done eventually.

This is as sketchy and precarious as it looks. By the end of the night when ice formed I was crawling on my hands and knees to get across.

White trash or practical?

Surprise in Sacrament

So I pick up a copy of the program and our ward's really intense monthly newsletter. I mean it's printed in color and shiny paper for goodness sakes!! Well I started perusing through it while the announcements were going when I gasped at what I saw.

Our ward has never done this before so I'm totally flattered that some guy (he spelled her last name incorrectly so I'm assuming it's a male) thinks I look like Rachel from the 90's even though I don't see any resemblance. I'm just happy it wasn't one of the Hilton sisters who I get regularly. Definitely an awesome surprise in the middle of sacrament meeting!

-di

Family Funnies

To be honest I really wish this blog just had stories about how funny I think our family is instead writing posts to keep you updated on my life since I know you don't do the facebook thing. For example, I've got a very good friend who loves to count how many white trash tendencies I have like how I can take a nap on any concrete sidewalk, walk into his house with a blender in my hand drinking a homemade smoothie because I just didn't have quite enough time to pour it into a cup, use wheel chairs in department stores when I'm tired of walking, eat some of my groceries before I've purchased them because I'm just too famished to possibly continue, etc. etc. Don't be offended but I usually tell him that I'm practically biologically inclined to do those things because of how I was raised. And I'm not saying that you ever taught me to sleep on the ground or eat my meals anywhere besides the dinner table but let's get real here, all the sneaking into hotels two by two as to not appear as if we're stuffing an entire family of 9 in one room, or making chocolate ice cream from vanilla and Nesquick because apparently it was too expensive to buy chocolate in bulk, has definitely rubbed off on me. That being said, I would need an audience to write about the family to make it worthwhile and since I think only a few siblings, a Jerusalem friend, and a couple people from home read this I'm kind of out of luck. But, I will take a quick opportunity to write a couple of family funnies that you aren't privy to being in Arizona. So here are some favorites of 2011 so far: 1. GRANDMA SMOOT -I went on a little run up to the house and she insisted that I run back home with a chicken sandwich and cookie. I tried to resist but she's really persuasive. And this is a pic of my new cleaning bucket. She said she couldn't find my old plastic one and improvised with a Pepsi container.

2. CJ-Okay I don't know how he's gotten away with not getting harassed by the older siblings or Tanner for that matter but he is really loving his floral design class....like maybe too much?? He said he'd give me give five bucks if I could name all the flowers and I lost it at Peruvian lillies. The second picture is his bicep adorned with henna tattoo. He was really proud of it and wanted it to be a surprise but said I could put a pic up in the meantime in case it fades before you get here. He still can't explain what "Someday Mom" means. Maybe "someday mom" I'll do accounting....are we allowed to joke about that yet?

3. JENNIE-This one is just a quote, and please don't be mad. Ever since I found out Ed was sneaking out I couldn't help but think that I've been a bad example for the younger kids. Anyway, Jennie called me from school one day and said, "I'm going to be just like you and not get married until I'm 25." Whoops.

4. DOUG-This weekend I called to see how he was liking conference when he said, "Deedee you know Loreli asked Luke to marry her on Gilmore Girls. You can totally do that." K, you probably don't know what this means but basically Doug, our too pragmatic for anything girly med student, has fallen for the quintessential estrogen filled TV show of the 2000's. In fact, I called yesterday to ask a question when he said I would have to call back because I was interrupting his latest episode.

5. ME-So yeah I'm still working on the overall thing and was pleasantly surprised to find a cohort in male form. Yes, his was in a costume for this Jewish party thing and I was just there for free food (notice treats in my front pocket-so practical) but still it's a step in the right direction for overalls to make a comeback.

That's all. I hope this has made you laugh a little.

Driving Miss Ann

Mother-

Okay I'm not the biggest fan of having more words than pictures in a post but I think this one calls for an exception. Long, long, long, story short, I drove Ann Madsen, wife of Truman G. home from the airport today. She told me all about her devotional she had just given at BYU-Idaho giving amazing insights on the sacrament while still showing her connection to the young adult world by referencing NCMO, aka non-committal make-out in case you didn't know that.

Afterwards she invited me into her house as we talked some more over fresh squeezed orange juice. Could my life have gotten better at that point?? Afterwards she showed me around her house when I discovered she owns a Mac too. I said, "Oh, I knew we'd get along, you're an apple person!" She replied, "Oh I love my Mac. You know, you never hear PC have that much pride." So with the NCMO reference, the Mac, and the fact that she was wearing Uggs I was completely old lady smitten.

Anyway, this brings my meaningful encounters of church celebrities to a big whopping two. Speaking of, I want to sign off on one more thought. I was reading my old journal of when I ran into President Monson in Grandma's living room and apparently (I don't remember this-thank goodness for journals) he toasted to my future with a glass of grape juice. Yes!!! My life is complete! I felt a renewed sense of purpose. So while you are freaking out about what my plans are I on the other hand can't think of anything that seals my fate with a divine kiss than a toast of grape juice-drink of the gods, or drink of President Monson at least:)

-diana

PS-Since I've got impeccable celebrity manners I did not ask for a photo soooooo here are a few from a recent Dr. Quinn watching. I'd make a great missionary for the show. There are definite converts in Provo.

So happy.....

We love you Jane Seymour.

The clapping is real. They want to belong to the church of Dr. Quinn.

Creative VT-ing

Mom,

This was my morning:

5:00 AM-Woke up.

5:15 AM-Met my VT comp and VTeachee at the temple to do baptisms.

6:00 AM-Left the temple

6:15 AM-Got in my comps hot tub to do visiting teaching. Oh gosh the best part was that we weren't in a sketchy south of campus one. This was in a huge house north of the temple and we got an awesome morning view as the sun came up.

I think God knows I don't have a solid testimony of visiting teaching so I got paired with an awesome comp and willing teachee who let's us get creative. After all, it can kind of be inherently boring unless you spice it up a little.....or heat it up a lot:)

love,

me

Be Proud

Mom,

You need to be proud of the fact that:

A. I've been accepted into the Hispanic community in Salt Lake.

2. CJ is now a floral designer and still heterosexual. This is a verbatim excerpt from our most recent conversation. He said, "I saw these boutonnieres at a reception last night. First of all, I could do a better job. Mistake one. You never make those with Gerber daises. Always roses."

D. I have found a new use for my collection of snuggies. My arms will be saved from cancerous UV rays when laying out.

Love,

me

Flying with Ice Cream

Mom,

No one loves logistical achievements like me. So obviously I take a ton of pride in the fact that I was able to transport two cartons of ice cream from AZ to UT on my latest flight without it turning into a messy milkshake.

Here's the story. My really good friend served in Texas and fell in love with Blue Bell ice cream. He's raved about it a number of times and honestly, I was skeptical until I tried the chocolate at Lauren's over Thanksgiving. Delicious. The company only sells it in select states one of which happens to be our great state of Arizona (and obviously not Utah) only solidifying my opinion that it is the best state in the Union. Plus, I purchased it in Gilbert so Dad should be happy I'm supporting local businesses.

Well after a few calls to Sky Harbor, the SLC Airport, and TSA I found out that you can totally take ice cream in your checked luggage. With a little help from a few pounds of dry ice and some tight wrapping of one of my jackets to act like a cooler, the cartons made it safely from Gilbert to Provo making me one very proud girl and one very happy friend.

-diana

ps-I'm at the hospital right now with Grandma and the nurse asked, "Are you one of her granddaughters?" I replied by saying, "Yes, one of many." Well I guess I didn't speak clearly enough because she thought I said my name was Minnie. I thought it would be fun to go along with but I didn't realize we we going to have a full conversation about Minnie Mouse and how much I liked her:) It just happened so I thought I would right about it because it made me laugh when he walked out of the room.

See totally frozen. Go me!

MOM,

Remember how I want to live on a farm this summer? Ba-hahahahahahaha. I still think it can happen but admittedly I think I just want to be a celebrity in a small town a little more than I actually want to "learn how to work." Three warm summer months of fame is all I need. But who am I kidding here? I grew up with you!! I know how to work!!! That being said, it's a new year and I'm not in school anymore which means I've got a little more time on my hands. My goal? Grow-up.

Now it's true (at least according to Lauren) I'm probably never going to be as mature as CJ or gosh, maybe even Jennie, kind of like Ben will never be more mature than Doug (again Lauren's words not mine). I call it youthfulness, some call it maturity. Whatever. Still, I certainly have some things I could do to help my case, like actually folding my laundry so my socks match, learning how to cook real meals, wearing lipstick on occassion, being on time for things, and ta-da....doing a budget.

The only bad part about the latter is that I realized last week I'm spending way too much of my paycheck on gas. So I decided to do the grown-up thing, suck it up, save money, and take the bus to work which means getting up at 6AM. Oh good heavens, even typing that makes me kind of dry-heave, sort of like I want to throw-up on anyone who smiles at me this early too. Below is a pic of how exactly I feel.

And since I think I chose the coldest week so far this winter, I've morphed into the consummate bag lady, piling on as many layers as possible to my body and carrying an odd amount of things in my hands. Basically I have to take a little bit of the bathroom, kitchen, and make-shift office I have with me. Add that to a bike and I definitely am looking a little homeless. Plus, I don't think the unmatching mittens are helping my case. Still working on the laundry thing:)

In this weather I would actually consider copping out and taking my car but long story short, it's in the shop for a couple of things. So if I wasn't going to do this I think God would have compelled me anyway. I almost asked Ray if I could put on my overalls and watch him work on the contour. You know, in my dreams of being an auto-mechanic and all I thought it would help. I wouldn't wear my snuggie of course as I think adults don't wear those in public. Actually maybe adults don't wear those at all....

Well I'm going to get back to sneaking my chocolate pudding for breakfast in the back of the bus. Following the guidelines of UTA is definitely not on my list of things to work on in 2011.

love,

your wannabe celebrity farmer/mechanic extraordinaire/

very youthful/somewhat grown-up daughter (at least for this week)

ps-thank goodness for free wi-fi-a huuuuge blessing on this dismal morning

Phil Dunphey Yo-

Learned how to change my oil today and did it all in a leopard snuggie. The overalls and rain boots are a usual part of my Saturday attire. Yes mom, that is a boy teaching me and no we are not dating so put your cell phone down right now and don't bother calling.

My friend had to do a profile assignment for an art class and used me as part of it. He's a kick-butt artist but I think the best part of this painting is the fact that I realized my hair has a curve! Whoot, whoot!! A few months ago it was just a fetus-tail but 3.5 inches has to merit a real pony-tail title.

love,
oily/curved pony di