High School Never Ends...

Who needs a job when you win the Division II BYU Intramural Football Championship, get the coveted t-shirt, and have a harem by your side? Poopstain looks pretty successful without one. Speaking of, it looks like somebody is on his way to a GF by Christmas. You gotta admit that things are looking really great since he quit that job:)

Love your snarky daughter.


Weekend in a Ghost Town

Hey Mom hey! So guess what I was doing a few weeks ago? Working on a little film project as per usual.

And hanging with Jerusalem friends while doing it. So long story short my friend who is a film student wanted to make a fan trailer for a new book that was coming out. It's bestseller and the author is actually a BYU professor. Anyway, I'm proud to say that I secured this sweet and free location in Kanab with a little ingenuity and a lot of help from Google. It's an old movie set/ghost town. It was actually used for several episodes of Gunsmoke so super legit, right? And also super dilapidated but I guess perfect for what we were doing.

We had a ton of fun and the best part was that it was only a weekend and pretty renegade style-my favorite. Below is a pic of Stevo. I convinced him that the best birthday present in the world would be for him to write his autobiography and give it to me. He's one of those friends who has amazing stories like getting a free trip to Europe paid for by a uber shady guy from Italy that he met on his mission that goes by four different names. Or one of my personal favs was when he hung out with a homeless guy for a day. That could probably be a book in and of itself. So anyway we did a little photo session to get the cover of his book. Looks like a guy you'd want to hear stories from right??

All in all it was a kick butt weekend and here's the final product:




Well I had two costumes this year. For work I was a polygamist (oh my gosh my office almost won the contest....even though the head of HR did say we were "wildly irreverent" we were definitely the company favorite) and for fun I was the one and only Justin Bieber. Too bad it's not an election year. I love those uber female politicians and I think I've got great hair for Michele Bachmann.

I've only got a pic of the first costume. What a shame;(


Which one is the boy?

Don't know if you already saw pics of this yet but I thought it was worth posting. They're both sooooo cute!


The Dirty Dash

Hey Mom Hey!

So the Dirty Dash is basically what it sounds like...a race in the mud. We had about 30 on our team and together tried to channel never-nudes from Arrested Development for our outfits. There were dozens of us!! I know you won't get that pop culture reference but just think of any form of jean cut-offs which provided the perfect opportunity to run in my overalls. Anyway, enjoy the pics. CJ was in this too. We tried to make it a family event but Jennie was studying as per usual.

Dirty Di

Let's just say someone thought he was going to be wheel-barreled the whole way because of an injury. I don't think it lasted more than a few hundred yards.

Now you see him...
Now you don't.

Pretty sure the Slater's wouldn't approve of Tyler's outfit.

Oh and here is the new girl of CJ's dreams.....


Red Rock Relay


CJ and I participated in a 180 mile, 12 person team relay from Brian Head to Zions. The experience was a blur but so much fun. And I'm soooo happy that the intense runners let a really slow jogger join them. Anyway, was anyone on our team surprised that Collin (it was a Brick Oven group) was wearing this as part of his running attire?? Not in the least.

Still hoping our family can do one of these some day...maybe with more clothes on:)


This was the finish line with half the team. Pretty sweet location.


King's Peak

Hey Mom-

Just hiked to the highest peak in Utah and tried my second bite of steak ever....still not my thing as you can see from my face.

Oh and after waiting patiently for four years my Sunday School class finally got to Acts 19:28. I know we don't do the whole pagan worship thing anymore but how many people get a shout out in the Bible?

Great is Me:)


Neon Bachelorette

This summer I got called to be an FHE mom. It's the calling that I've been pining after for years and I wasn't going to waste it on boring lessons and cliche activities. Now the neon light thing isn't that novel but what about the neon light thing topped with the season finale of The Bachelorette? Huh? Huh?? My kids all looked so sucked in! Am I a sinner or a saint? I mean essentially the principles of the show are the exact same as any singles ward. Get married and get married fast. Oh and look your hottest while doing it. Anyway, we really bonded this night so I feel justified in the lack of....shall we say "wholesome" activity?

Maybe we should have been watching the ever more appropriate Mormon Bachelorette, which btw is a real thing. I should probably apply. I feel like my spiciness would be appreciated.

Princess Di-wait, or should it be St. Diana: Bringing unorthodox activities to Provo, UT one FHE group at a time????


Grandfather of Twins

K, I'm done with overalls. No one is following my trendsetting ways. Grrrrrrr. As an eternal optimist though I'm onto better things like funny hats. This is my new favorite one. Who could not love me in this??


ps- today the family was watching a movie downstairs when i noticed that kelvin was missing....or so i thought. i asked the group, "where is kelvin?" kelvin responded by saying, "sure, you pick the black kid not to notice." i'm so glad we have color in our family so these jokes are semi-appropriate and justified. and on my end he was sitting on a dark couch. he really did blend in!!!


A Post Script to the T-shirt

This is amazing. The pic below is of the receipt that came with the shirt. I didn't notice until I was about to throw it away that something was written on it. Dad now has two people on his side: me and "Cheers Man." I have no idea who he is and the fact that I ordered it from San Antonio, TX should prove to be even more random.


John Lewis for Congress

So Dad's Father's Day present finally came in the mail and I am stoked!! I know he would die before wearing it in public and it might end up on a quilt one day, but I'm hoping he adores it as much as his Creamery shirt, which btw was paid for by extra $$ I had on Dining Plus back in the dorm days so really he paid for it but his adoration is endearing nonetheless-read below.....
I'm also hoping that it might bring some inspiration for a future in DC. I might just drop over dead if something like that happened.

Real quick. I was hanging with Grandma Smoot today when she informed me that she'd been married for almost 58 years. "Whoa, holy cow," I said. "I didn't realize it had been so long. What do you think you're going to do for the big 60?"

"Get buried," was her response. "I've got so much junk in this house. When we die we'll be up there laughing at all of you."




Mom, I may not be betrothed in real life but I got me a nice mountain man, three kids, and a homestead this particular weekend at this Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman photo shoot. Leave it to me to organize something weird like this. But as event planner guess who got to be the star? Yours truly. Enjoy the pics!

MATTHEW, BRIAN, and COLLEEN-my adopted kids and of course our horse SUNTAN:)
DAVID-The fiance who died in the Civil War....or so we all thought! He really does have an eye patch in the show.
Eye Patch David or chest baring Sully?
And the winner is SULLY-Mountain man extraordinaire who always appears at the right time and with a shirt that seems to show more of his tanned chest with each passing episode.
SNOW BIRD-Wife of Cloud Dancing who couldn't make the shoot (it's hard to find people of color here).
DORTHY-BFF of Dr. Mike and town newspaper editor.
MYRA-The town's.....Jezebel?? She's depressed because Hank, the saloon owner, won't let her out of her contract so she can marry Horace, the town's endearingly nerdy telegrapher.
THE REVEREND and ROBERT E.-Like I said, we had problems finding people a little darker than our group so my friend Elizabeth used a lot of makeup to mask the whiteness. So glad she used overalls to become the Blacksmith.
MATTHEW and INGRID-The town's Swedish immigrant who eventually dies of rabies. They were officially engaged at one point though with the ring that Eye Patch David gave Dr. Mike.